Airsoft celebrity Stretch the chicken of Super Mega Tactical Airsoft News will be coming to the AGM game on Saturday. To help us set up the VIP area his people have sent us his rider-

To the secretary of Matt Furey-King

For Stretch to attend any event the following must be complied with:

No poor people.

No mention of KFC.

No mention of battery farming.

Stretch would like the following in the hospitality area

1. Children’s tears

2. Bakewell cake and tart.

3. Seeds and grain

4. Green and red Opal Fruits. Not starburst

5. A signed picture of Judith Chalmers. This can be supplied.

The following are not to be within eye sight of mr Stretch.

1: kale

2. Vegans

3. People with hipster beards.

4. Unicorns

5. People with YouTube channels who just harvest likes

6. Children under the age of 12.